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revelations :: the freedom of going to the well + trusting your instincts

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Do you find yourself longing for approval at every turn? Searching for answers and discovering in hindsight, that you had exactly what you needed? Defending what you do and why you do it?

These are just a few examples of what we encounter, when we’re not in a place of knowing and trusting ourselves.

I personally experienced this last night, on a flight at cruising altitude from Washington D.C.: doubt, panic and tears streaming like a flood zone, with "what the F$%?s" playing like a loop of bad studio music through my brain. Finally, I regained composure and pulled it together.

Thank god for revelations…

From my arsenal of personal perspective, the worst decisions that I’ve made, were based on someone else’s advice, that is, when I already knew at a visceral or gut level that I was on the right track.

Well meaning, people at times and with the best of intentions are chock full of advice. I’ve made it my personal policy, not to offer unsolicited advice on a situation or scenario, unless that is, you’re my child, my husband, you request it, or the situation is dire. Why? It may inadvertently create deviation from what you know to be true for yourself: the truth that will open portals of meaning + moments of insight for personal growth.

Soulful Offerings: 

* You are your life’s coach. Harness the skill and learn to tap deep into your personal well of knowing + trust. This is a practice that takes clarity and repetition until the results are such that you have proven to yourself (and nobody else), that only you know, what’s best for YOU. There will be a level of comfort and ease when you get to this place – an overall sense of well being + confidence. Believe in the realness of this moment, because it’s just that, for real.

* Find people in your tribe to draw wisdom from. Identify those sage individuals that really “see you”. They’re the people that may lend themselves, offer the insight and the gift of being ever-so-slightly removed enough to add value as they really wish you to succeed. 

Give it the name of your choosing: North Star, Sacred Ambition, or Calling. Glimmers of insight, lucidity, strokes of creative clarity, intuition + genius ~ at your beckoning. When they arrive, ride their wave to freedom.

 

:: contractual beliefs + the proverbial “Plan B”

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It’s said that “Plan B” is the just-in-case-things-don’t-work-out-for-me plan we design for ourselves, when “Plan A”, seems out of our reach or impossible. “Plan B” is aka: “our escape hatch”.

“B” my friends, is for backup. At those times when we’re hanging on by a thread; when life is a struggle or careers are temporarily flat lining, we go for “B”. Why? "B" is our safety net.

What are Soul Contracts? They’re beliefs and agreements we’ve made with ourselves both consciously and unconsciously. Times that we’re sorting and sifting, when events in life seem “iffy” at best.  Ask yourself: What contracts or agreements have I made that are allowing me to shift focus and energy away from “Plan A”?

              Believe me, I’ve asked myself that same question.                       

Shift focus + recalibrate. Aim for what you soulfully, 100% want:        

“Plan A” = Authenticity, Aspiration, Adoration.

Metaphorically kick “Plan B” to the curb.

Aim for “Plan A”. Work where the least amount of effort will have the greatest affect. This theory is golden. It’s time well spent when we’re doing what we love + right where we should be.

 

co-creating your dharma + desire ::

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Dharma or (Destiny): Our true place in the cosmic process. Desire: The true meaning - “of or guided by the (sire) stars”.

What is Desire? Have you ever experienced the rush of desire; that feeling of passion for someone or something you cannot wait to wake up to or that experience that brings you joy? The healthy exuberance of creative possibility, or the excitement of the artistic unknown: a life that’s self-actualized by your own design is attainable, if you’re in tune with your dharma, destiny or calling. Have you wondered why some people make what seems so out of reach, so undeniably effortless? The answer: Unwavering Belief + Desire. They’re not seeking outside approval, nor do they spend time scrutinizing the actions of others; so steadfast about what they desire, they're unrelenting at setting their own bar, bunkering down and staying their course.

Co-creating a life you take pride in, is to be willing and open to the potential for possibility or failure, but in the inherent knowing that your power lies deep within. It’s all there and always has been. To seek external approval is as to deem ourselves unworthy and undeserving. It is the furthest point from “the divine”, that we can be. It can automatically throw walls up for failure. The onus and responsibility to guide our own course, is on us and only us. To do right by ourselves not only betters us, but betters society as a whole and solidifies the concept of self-sustainability and interconnectedness.

To follow our heart’s desire, hold every encounter every experience with reverence, as it is our dharma or cosmic blueprint; that demonstration of faith and strength sometimes shows itself, in the unknown.  It too, can even be in the uncertainty that a shred of proof exists. We have the potential to become the co-creators and Rembrandts of our lives.

                         You can do this. I PROMISE.

     "We can either watch life from the sidelines OR ACTIVELY PARTICIPATE…. Either we let SELF-DOUBT and FEELINGS OF INADEQUACY prevent us from realizing our potential, or embrace the fact that when we turn our attention away from ourselves, OUR POTENTIAL IS LIMITLESS."           ~Christopher Reeve                                                                                                                       

                                                                                                

career complacency, mediocrity + passion

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What led me to here.

Picture this: The scene, circa mid 1990’s, Donna Karan suit, Joan + David loafers. Hair: executive blonde with a Jennifer Aniston, sort-of-blowout. I once negotiated my salary with a C.E.O. on a paper napkin… priceless.

6 a.m., toxic aftershave, coma-induced flight to JFK. Swank digs in Manhattan at the Soho Grand Hotel (or) flight to Philly, town car to Wilmington, luscious suite at the Hotel DuPont. Week long, brand strategy marketing meetings with global directors and their teams. I organized + conducted futuristic “think tanks”.  Not to mention the three hour, mind numbing “get it done”, conference calls that doubled as house cleaning sessions - thanks to the home office. Add a high octane diet coke chugging, micro-managing boss, who lived on no sleep – with a new born baby no less, you get the picture. Clawing and scraping for the rush of accolades + kudos… pure ego.

I got great at pushing paper, generating quantitative and qualitative reports that more than likely, no one ever read. I got good at justifying my corporate existence. Email after email, meeting after meeting. Five years later, I jumped ship, just two years before the S.S. Corporate Titanic sank. The positions that were created were dissolved. Non-sustaining business practices as usual: old school ideologies in this case, did not stand the test of time.

That said, we do, what we gotta do. I knew this job would not last forever or at least, I wouldn’t. I was certain that I'd learn alot about what I did or didn’t like within the confines in which I'd thrive. So I sucked it up, and milked that job like it was the career from heaven above; treating it like the Harvard Business School education that I never had. I was exposed to an evironment of working with top executives, professional athletes, inventors and thought leaders for Fortune 500 companies. The hours ranged from 60 to 80 hours a week, (I had a toddler), and I was paid handsomely for my absence.

The big upside: I learned a lot about myself in that; unless I could see the direct value correlate to the end result it meant nothing to me, utterly and thoroughly, soul-less. It taught me to think longer range, bigger picture, grow thicker skin and shoot straight from the hip.

To repurpose your blood + sweat, knowing at the end of the day, that lessons are learned, you’ll remain unscathed and all the approval you sought or thought you sorely needed, was always or never there; that in itself, got me to here. And for that, I’m eternally grateful.

 

What do you want to be when you grow up?

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 A message of hope: for you late bloomers.

I’ve had a high school student ask me, “How do I explain to my parents, that I want to be a dancer, when they want me to be a doctor?” Why on earth do we talk ourselves or the people we love, out of doing what it is they’re meant to do?

Life as a gift, offers you the option to quest for your “higher self”.  You should be unapologetically relentless in your pursuit, without convoluting the idea of who you think you are, or what you should be doing. External influence plays a monumental role in self-deprecating; the way we limit our aspirations or measure our sites based on what everyone else is doing, as though all the answers are outside of us. Need for permission from someone or something rather than owning our gut instinct, is a dishonoring of our capabilities and the desire for more that nourishes us.   

Our “smaller self” is inundated with the day in day out, trivial stuff that long term, is of no consequence. It’s how we’re wired. Better to go the easy route, guaranteeing we won’t fail.  God forbid we venture outside the lines and play it too risky. The fear factor of being too blazing, or too amazing, scares the hell out of people. That light bulb moment will happen toward the last third of our life…if we’re conscious, it’s our queue to break out.

Learning to trust our first instinct is a gift and a skill. By quieting thoughts and listening to your heart, your capabilities are limitless. This is the mechanism by which dreams come to fruition ~ your inner wisdom, will never steer you wrong.

Build a matrix that cradles your growth.         

Live Multi-Dimensionally + Spherically.

right now: You have permission to be your most resilient, vulnerable, most powerful and courageous self. To live a life of abundance full of love, laughter and success on your terms whatever that may be in whatever way, shape or form you see fit. You are in the driver’s seat. The trick is to never, ever look back.

Leverage your inherent skill-set + promo ideas that will rock your business

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juicy ideas + savvy ingenuity = marketing power.                  

Last month, I struck up a conversation with a woman who was sitting next to me at a neighborhood business.  During our exchange, we talked jobs.  She mentioned her past career of many years, in the public sector as an executive assistant.  As a highly skilled professional with no college degree, she was passed over for promotion numerous times until eventually, her position was dissolved. What did she do? She started a successful cleaning business that’s been rolling for over 20 years. Her client base is solid, she’s able to care for herself, call her own shots and pursue her love of rowing. Bonus: at 60’ish, she looks like she’s in her 50’s. Her resourcefulness, resiliency + faith, Left me inspired.

 A gift for you. {My A to Your Q} Subscribe to my blog (if you aren’t already), or forward this to a friend.

Email me your Q (question) + I will respond with my A (answer).  To anything: life, business, love. 

Entrepreneurial know how: the tried + true combined with imagination: make your ventures, your own. Apply these out-of-the-box ideas, liberally.

1.  Beef up your social media: Facebook, Twitter, Linked In (exchange recommendations).

2.  Volunteer for causes that you’re in-line with. You never know what other “liked minded” people you’ll meet.                                                                                                               

3.  Commission a student artist to design a logo or artwork for a promo piece or your website. 

4.  Offer yourself up for a magazine or radio interview, or blog. 

5.  Create a pay-what-you-can day.

6.  Feature other experts on your web site or at a “live” event.

7.  Create a welcome video on your site or for your “about me”/bio, page.

8.  Write your bio in first person.

9.  Create a brown paper lunch session, to introduce businesses to your services.

10.  Hire a V.A. (virtual assistant), to help you rock your contact lists and social media.

11.  Team up with other Entrepreneurs in your community and offer workshops to the public.

12.  Put together an informal round table of businesses and business owners that you admire, exchange ideas that have worked.

13.  Self publish an e-book of your blogs, expert advice, or your artwork.

14.  Pitch a monthly column to a blog, print newspaper, or magazine.

15.  Host a teleseminar or web event, with the cost going to charity.  Invite a local expert to participate.                                                                                                                               

16.  Host a contest related to your industry.

17.  Volunteer: Speak to students at your local schools. 

18.  Offer your services for free, to another start up.

19.  Send a thank you note + gift to a person(s) that has helped you along the way.

20.  Accept + offer help when the opportunity presents itself.
 

 

 

Soulful offerings + other Truisms

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Loving testaments, dedicated to you {my soul-drenched friends}.

“Deep involvement is the key to any relationship.” Mary Abi Nader, Creative Consultant.

What if?  things you thought you knew to be true, were untruths. 

What if?  self-banter you claimed as yours was unknowingly, non-consensual stifling your ascension. False beliefs, often times, are bestowed upon us through intrinsic inheritance. Sometimes even passed down generationally. The negative fodder we willingly or consciously succumb to, was never ours to acquire. What do you believe? What's your emotionally and spiritually inequitable story? That “stuff” seeps into all areas of our daily existence.

Take ownership, self proclaim. Deem yourself worthy, surrender to your power… create unchallenged, holistic attachments by lifting the veil that obscures your vision.

How do you want to feel? Exuberant, Lavish, Soul-drenched? Pivot your story. Love trumps all; Love requires a deep commitment, a relationship of personal involvement. You are your most treasured commodity.

Make the radical, habitual choice; turn your love inward.

Be the Love of Your Life. The very essence of what you radiate will magnetically draw and cultivate all goodness to life. It’s undeniably what you’re worthy of and the very reason for your existence. It's waiting to lay claim.

 

Seeking Solitude + Slaying Isolation

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A Balancing Act.

Powerful words when we’re striving to be all that we can be. In the millennium of social media, reality television, virtual networking and “hyper connectivity,” the realness of what’s real becomes falsely muddled.

In spite of all that we’re conceiving and creating, there’s tendency at our worst, to squander the best of us; this habitual activity can incite loss of physical and emotional traction. I say this after "missing" 10 o'clock yoga, then noon and now I'm re-thinking yoga all together.....

Well, there's always tomorrow.

regaining equilibrium:

: Avoid feelings of spiritual exile by reaching out face to face, in real time, with those people that sustain you. The exchange can be grounding + rooting.

: Strengthen a relationship by calling a friend or family member and spend the time, you may otherwise not have. Renew a sense of belonging + connectivity.

: Stay at home over a weekend; rest, cook meals, read. Forget schedules...experience liberation + sanctity.

: Spend time in solitude conceptualizing life, career or creative pastimes that you can potentially share with trusted friends or colleagues. This deliberate act will lend itself, to a life full of intent and worth: igniting organic creativity.

Being enough is about balance. It’s about being your own vessel, but knowing when to dive right in and swim with the fishes.

 

the unequivocal power of persuasion, (that you can easily master)

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The act of inducing someone to believe something. Preferably, without force.

Persuasion is one part preconceived self actualization as in, “I know when I pitch this idea, I will blow the C.E.O out of the water!" The other key components: belief + unfaltering faith.   

In business and entrepreneurial endeavor, persuasion is a formulaic blend of both strategic and tactical action. Persuasion, in its purest form, is best when delivered with simplistic integrity and inspiration.

   The gift of swaying people with a thought, view, sentiment, opinion, product or service can be learned, but if it doesn’t come naturally, it requires practice and repetition. Only then will it become inherently, authentically yours.

1. Know your audience.

2. Know your product.

3. Practice a seamless pitch i.e.; “inspired delivery”, include "the why”.

4. Believe in your brand. Emphasize aspirational + tangible value and benefits.

5. Visualize the desired result, as if it’s so.

6. Get comfortable with “the ask”: cement a clear understanding of your path forward.

This is a moment to be savored; a culmination of your history and hard work, failure and success, it waits patiently to be unveiled. This is the {your} time... right here, right now.

“The purpose of life, after all, is to love it, to taste experience to the utmost, reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience”. Eleanor Roosevelt

the beauty + art of improvisation

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“Knowing your craft really well, allows room for improvisation.” Zoë Keating

Creation, like art + life is a mixture of perfection and imperfection. In that space or moment, the beauty lies between the perfect and imperfect.

The melding of deliberate composition + impromptu improvisation has the ability to break down creative barriers which may otherwise in their delivery, been received as contrived or inorganic.

Case in point: Meet Avant Cellist + Entrepreneur, Zoë Keating. Today, I had the pleasure of meeting Zoë on the set of another episode of  Chase Jarvis Live .

The accomplished and groundbreaking artist :: musician has mastered the ability to market directly to her fans, without a record label. This not only is a testament to Zoë’s talent + business savvy, but the bold power of creativity and ingenuity that can translate to all aspects of our endeavors.

Take Your Head Where Your Heart Wants To Go.

 

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